Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
