he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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