I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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