Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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