So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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