WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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