then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
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drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
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I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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