Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
