What did we do last night that was yellow?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I'm passing your future prison.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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