Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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