Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize