do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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