My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize