I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize