I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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