What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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