Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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