so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
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as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
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A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize