After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i love accidental penises.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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