Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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