This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
