I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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