After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
