There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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