hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
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Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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