Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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