Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
third nipple confirmed
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
