Its about making memories worth repressing
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
