That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
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I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
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And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
why is half of my head shaved?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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