ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
