Acid is not a monday night drug
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
