Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
We should try that some time.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.