Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize