okay pat passed out under dana's car
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
All the doctor said was why
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
