there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
