Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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