I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize