on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
