so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
