All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
When are your genitals available?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
