there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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