bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Me too!
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I see more hoeing in ur future
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