we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I have already put on my inside pants.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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