hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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