Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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