Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
