My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
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