Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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