How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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