I bet he comes in French.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I have fence marks all over my body
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
