i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
