i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
23 “Girl Codes” Guys Probably Don’t Know About
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN